Sunday, December 04, 2005

Change Agent

So. You love the heck out of someone. Someone has a problem. You see the problem. In lucid moments someone sees the problem as well. But those lucid moments are few and far between. Someone doesn't really see their problem as the real problem that it is. Merely a simple issue, but not a problem. Not a problem that impacts family, friends--real friends, not the ones who enable someone.

I don't know what to do. Really, there is nothing I CAN do.

Everyone says it and knows it and I understand it. Someone has to want to change in order to change. Layer that on top of the common knowledge that people don't change. Is it hopeless?

So then. My birthday was fantastically simple. I am really LOVING a far less complicated life. Dear boyfriend took me out to the Comedy Underground where I laughed my butt off. Got back to his place and got gifts so very apropo. We're going to go to Walla Walla when it gets warmer (smile) and he got me a carry on travel bag. Red of course (smile). Perfect [censored]. Then, Sunday morning we went to breakfast, ran some errands and I hung out at his place as he installed lights. He cooked me dinner and sent me on my way so that I'd be able to get up early enough to take the bus to work in the morning.

Not so much. I ended up driving the whole way today. I'll definitely need to take the bus a heckuva lot more often to deter the stop at one of my fave craft stores along the way. Just picked up a few items for an amazing gift idea I have for the boyfriend. He's gonna love it...capitalism aside (smile). Hey...I DID support the economy by buying the supplies for it.

[censored] job--rocks the house. [censored] I love it. [censored].

Okay...time to mourn my loses, post a photo and "suck it up already" and try again. Check my other blogs for more.


Sheri's widower said...

When "some one" has a problem... as the Rev. Eric Camden puts it on "Seventh Heaven"... be harmless, not helpful. You sho nuff can't help 'em. Quite often one finds that the "problem" is not the problem. The apparent problem is the excuse for not getting through the real problems. "Man, I was just about to acheive this really, really super great accomplishment, but then my (problem) hit again and since its a disease and I can't really help myself I couldn't acheive the acheivement after all." If you can't get at the roots of what the "problem" masks, you can't help. If you clean up after the "problemed" person's foibles, you enable. It's messed up and heartbreaking and doesn't stop until they stop it or God does. So like the I'm-not-a-real-Rev-but-I-play-one-on-TV says "be harmless, not helpful...."

That Girl said...

word. she will get it together. but we enable not because we want to hurt, but because we love.